I forgot to mention - I got out of class early (was it yesterday? they're all starting to blur together) and there was this guy running up and down Marylebone High Street. Unremarkable except for several things: it was about 4pm or so and there was a bit of traffic; it was chilly; he was dressed in a little gold crown, gold short shorts (think Goldmember), a gold cape and...gold boots?
I had to pass him to go home because he ran past and then was just hanging out there on the sidewalk. "What happened? Did you lose a bet?" I asked him. I never expected him to say yes! So - further note to self: never make a bet with friends in London which involve humiliating yourself in public in the event of a loss. Who knows, there may be incriminating photographic evidence. I would have taken a photo but it didn't occur to me at the time.
Questionable girly credentials
The girls in London tend to wear really short skirts. How many of you boys just sat up and took notice?
Yes, reallly short. They pair them with tights and boots, either with or without a heel. I am showing my age - all I can wonder is whether they happened to look in the mirror before they left the house and how come they couldn't afford to buy the other 60% of their skirts. Generally, short skirts are a bit like Speedos - you don't necessarily see them on the people you'd like to see wearing them. Call me Grandma.
I don't understand the super short skirts and I don't understand the ugly, ugly shoes. I blame the ugly shoe trend for the last 3 years on Hollywood and movies (I'm looking at you, Sex and the City!) - if there's a hot trend, wouldn't you want to have at least a couple of classic things that aren't trendy for the non-fashionista crowd who don't care about the plastic crystal triangly things that go up the front of your foot and ankle and make your legs look short and stumpy?
I'm just saying - just because it looks good on a supermodel. Um, hello - she gets paid a zillion (insert your currency of choice here) a year because she can make it look halfway decent. Are you a supermodel? No? Then don't! It could look great on you. Or it could look awful. Take a look at who writes your paychecks and then decide. (And while we're at it, even supermodels don't look good in those bubble skirts - and they're professional clothes hangers. If you're over the age of 5 - don't! My eyes, my eyes! They're not cutesy on you and they make you look like you have a big butt, so unless you're going for that look, in which by all means...)
Today's cooking lesson
We did 4 base sauces today: brown veal stock (very nice), white chicken stock (cloudy because it boiled too fast), tomato sauce (which was too thin and seasoning didn't come through because it didn't reduce enough) and a bechamel (a bit too thick and the flour not cooked enough - still gritty on the teeth).
But seriously - the only ones we actually had enough time to (sort of) finish was the bechamel and the tomato sauce. The others went into enormous pots which then went to the production kitchen to be finished.
In which a key ingredient is missing (and more than once)
So my partner sous-chef had taken her list and was very concientiously checking it against our ingredients, then checking it twice (we were ignoring who was naughty or nice, although the fellows in the Production kitchen are on both lists). They said, "don't worry, we know what you need." This is after she caught them out with missing bacon (pancetta - for the tomato sauce) and white wine (to deglaze our veal pan).
FYI - the elevator was fixed sometime between 4pm yesterday and 8am today.
Apparently what we needed was more exercise. We were short 2 veal bones so I went down for those. And then...
What do you think we would need for a tomato sauce? That's right, some tomato puree, chicken stock, mirepoix, garlic and...yes, tomatoes. There weren't any. So down I went for a tray of tomatoes. Luckily for the other 2 kitchens doing the same recipe, they were still in the basement so they didn't have to make an extra trip for the tomatoes, but since they still had all their other stuff to take up to their kitchens, I schlepped the tomatoes up by the back fire stairs.
And then...more exercise. Because there was no parsley, stalks or otherwise, in our boxes. Down again, because all the (one! You can see why I had that little problem yesterday) elevators were in use. I had to pass the other kitchens anyway, so I dropped some off with them because sure enough, I heard someone asking Chef in Kitchen 1/1 for some parsley for their mirepoix. Luckily on that last trip I could take the elevator up. It was getting a bit tiring, all this running and as some of you may know (and now all of you know) - I don't run.
Each time the guys saw me, I could see them thinking, "now what?" I finally said to them that I thought it was their way of contributing to our fitness regime, what with the gym which used to be across the laneway being gone and all. Chef D looked me up and down and said, "yes, you do need to lose weight." (I wish I could get his sarcastic tone in this post...)
So - 3 trips up and down the stairs after class had started - resulted in losing a fair bit of cooking time. We were given about 2 hours and I think I lost at least 15 - 20 minutes (running - sorry, walking, up and down several flights of stairs, getting the extra ingredients). When you're at my level (i.e. still takes ages just to peel an onion) that makes the difference between a cooked bechamel sauce and one that isn't. So flustered that the rest of my lesson was absolute chaos. Chef wanted to know what had happened. I think he said something like "it's so weird - yesterday your station was meticulous. Today it's all over the place - very messy."
So - must work on organization. Maybe not to so many trips up and down the stairs next time? And ew - covered in either chicken or raw beef juice - the smell was enough to turn me vegetarian on the spot. Everything came home with me and went through the laundry on hot water - twice. Maybe I should do it again...
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| It actually doesn't look bad in this picture at all... |
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| The burn 3 days later... |
Clearly I will not be able to work in a commercial kitchen because I won't be able to lift the heavy stuff (and according to a friend in the know, there is no chivalry in a commercial kitchen). If Gordon Ramsay is anything to go by, I would find conversation of limited interest there anyway, so most likely not going to be a career change even if I were confident of my cheffing abilities. At this point I will be grateful to finish the course intact. Have considered change of musical instrument - one where I don't need all my fingertips, or at least not the full reach and/or sensitivity. Voice? No, then you would need to sing in places other than in the shower...
So, tomorrow - roast chicken, broccoli and glazed baby onions (great - chance to practice glazing - more butter, more sugar!). Note to self: don't do anything not on the procedures (i.e. no more fingers/hands/any other body parts). After all, this is only the second week and I've only got 10 fingers and 2 hands. Can't use them all up now, what about Intermediate and Superior Cuisine? Not to mention all the fun in Pastisserie, especially when we get to the sugar work.
So until next time - use pot mitts!
How's this for a letter home?
Dear Mom and Dad,
I bet that you didn't think about what being in a kitchen would do to my hands and wrists. Neither did I! Is it too late to confess to vanity and say that I may never change careers because as painful as paper cuts and plastic folder cuts can be, they generally only leave small scars instead of taking chunks of flesh and/or nails? Good to know my previous education won't be wasted.
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